Vegetarians suck. But Eat less meat anyway.

Nothing will benefit human health and increase chances for survival of life on Earth as much as the evolution to a vegetarian diet.  ~Albert Einstein

Cards on the table. I'm a vegetarian, and have been since 2003. And yes, my vegetarian wife Alison had a role to play in my conversion. Fact. But I had to believe in it myself and always had. You see I love animals, and found that eating them was the biggest single contradiction in my life. It was a pleasure laying it to rest and I haven't missed meat one single day of my life.

David Beckham - I miss the Golden Balled one.

David Beckham returned to wear the Manchester United shirt last week for the first time since he packed his Louis Vuitton bags in a rush exit back in 2003. The occasion was Gary Neville's testimonial. Testimonials used to be arranged for players who had notched ten years service, as a thank you to boost their pension funds ahead of a long retirement. Let's face it they are becoming a bit redundant, since the gate receipts probably equate to less than one month's salary, and well some players look like they are never going to retire anyway.

Does the 2011 EPL Premier League show us that it's a league in decline?

Like many I watched the UEFA Champions League at the weekend in complete awe at the level at which Barcelona played the beautiful game. Surely that was exactly how it should be played; skill, passing, movement, flair, speed, the team in blue and red were mesmerising. Even Sir Alex was humbled for the first time in his life and had to admit United 'were hammered.'

Commuting by Train in Melbourne - How chewing gum (almost) led to Murder on the Limited Express

May 2011, Melbourne.


Commuting is a horrible part of being a 9 to 5 lifer like me. Some days are better than others, and today was a bad day. I swear I could have killed a man on the train this morning. It wouldn't have been self defence, as he hadn't threatened me with violence. I couldn't have pulled an ASBO on him, because even though he was playing music ridiculously loud through his Dr Dre ear mufflers, I quite liked his tunes. The fact that he was a personal space invader amazingly didn't rile me too much either - besides I got my own back by kicking his ruck sack into some spilt coffee. I was nearly pushed over the edge by his skinny jeans and long pointy shoes, but I hung on in there with some deep breathing exercises.

Our Neighbours in Australia....

Eco-Beach YHA, Apollo Bay

A YHA with the X Factor!”

Date of review: May 21, 2011- New

April 2011: This was our third stay at the Eco-Hostel, and each time has been fantastic. The location is perfect, and not just because it's in one of the most picturesque bays in Victoria - the hostel itself is just two minutes from the restaurants and shops, and five minutes from the glorious beach.

A Survivor's Guide to Riyadh

In a poll of the top ten dullest cities in the world, it's a possibility that Riyadh could fill all ten positions. If your boss ever hints that it would be a good opportunity to develop the market there, I strongly suggest you start working on your excuses now. Or resign. If that's a bit drastic, and you're all out of excuses, I can offer you this survivor's guide as a last resort.

Kelso Sands Holiday Park, Tamar Valley, Tasmania

“Wildlife Heaven, in the stunning Tamar Valley” Date of review: May 22, 2011- New

March 5, 2011: We had spent a week working our way up to the Tamar Valley, near Launceston, in a rather nifty camper van, having landed in Hobart. We had one very good reason to go out of our way to stay here, and that was the promise of seeing wombats around the site after dusk. In fact so concerned were we that we might miss them, Alison even phoned ahead around 5pm to see what time we could expect them.

Our Fijian Trip, April 2011

My very first attempt at a movie... I hope its not as dull as a slide show.

I'm spotting an opportunity.... South America looks clear for landing some time soon...

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Myths & Legends Australia: Over 35's Master Basketball

It sounds like a fierce shoot-em-up, action packed one hundred mile an hour playstation game, straight out of 'Nam. It couldn't be further from reality. I'm actually referring to a weekly snail paced shoot-if-you-have-the-strength scene of convalescence for former addicts.

Welcome to the world of over 35's basketball, my spiritual rest home.

The Comics Lounge, Melbourne

We had a fun night at The Comics Lounge in North Melbourne last night. You know the drill if you've ever been to an old school comedy night: a bill of 3 or 4 comedians, a slick MC and host, and a room full of rowdy, tipsy and willing party goers. Throw in six hundred and eighty two uses of the F-Word and you pretty much have the full picture.

Is there such a thing as celebrating too much?

I thought the English cricket team won the award for over the top celebrations when they reclaimed the Ashes in 2005. And then last week or so Manchester United won their nineteenth premier title, and I received a tonne of mails from gloating United fans. I dread to think what will happen if they win the Champions League Final next week.

Anyway, it's by the by. They have all been outdone. The Finnish team have just won the Ice Hockey world championship for the first time ever. If fact it might be the first time Finland have won just about anything. So maybe we should forgive them. Or not.

Things to Do in Dubai

A few people have asked me for tips on things to do in Dubai, so here's a quick low down on the capital of Gulf Glitz.

You can't dig too deeply for culture in the big Dubya, it's a pretty shallow ride, but if you know where to look, there's just enough to keep you interested for a week. If you like the finer things in life and non-stop sunshine, there's pampering to be had around every souk corner and beaches galore.

Diego Maradona Moves to Dubai: 5 Reasons he will love it!

It was announced yesterday that football legend Diego Maradona will take over as manager at the Dubai based Al Wasl football club next season. At first sight, it may come as a complete shock that such a renowned figure would turn up in that Mecca of world football we know as the United Arab Emirates. But I think it's a match made in heaven. Read on ....

The Best Road Signs of Melbourne, Australia - They are legendary.

May 2011, Melbourne, Victoria. 

Australians have plenty to say, and say it they must. Whether it be over a coffee, down the footy, or through their road signs, which is my personal favourite.  They never miss an opportunity to say it in words, even when there really isn't any need. Still, it can be good for a laugh. Here's a few I've come across in the past year or so:

The Fijian Resort, Yanuca Island, Fiji

We went against the grain a little with this trip. We hardly ever stay in luxury hotels, always meticulously plan our trips, like to be in the thick of the action, and we tend to keep moving on, backpacks in tow. Yet somehow we had booked a last minute trip for 7 nights in a 5* Shangri-La resort in the middle of nowhere, in a place we knew absolutely nothing about. That tends to happen when you forget to book somewhere to go two weeks before you have a week off. Still, that said, with the thought of seven days of tropical Fijian luxury ahead of us, we weren't complaining, and definitely not worried. Until I decided to read the hotel reviews the day before we were due to travel. Talk about opening a can of worms.

Stop. Hammer Time.

May 2011, Melbourne. 

Picture the scene. A nightclub floor crammed with floppy haired kids, decked out in matching checked shirts and baggy jeans. The DJ is pumping out a Rap tune, everyone on the floor is dancing like crazy. They anticipate the cue. 'STOP'. Everybody freezes. 'HAMMER TIME.' As one, they  break into a united frenzy, running frantically on the spot, smiles beaming, hands waving, co-ordination most definitely lacking. Yep, there were an inevitable few fallers too. (But not, I hasten to add, me, Ash or Mikey; we had this one nailed.)

2011 Ashes Series: MCG, Boxing Day Test: The Day England Won the Ashes

The first day of the Boxing Day test match in Melbourne, and I had a funny feeling we were about to see something special. The series was tied at 1-1, and although England had been beaten heavily in Perth, I felt that the England bowling attack would come good again in Melbourne. At the same time, Mitchell Johnson had his day in the sun as far as I was concerned, and he would be revisiting planet mediocrity faster than his leg side wides.

Mark Butler in 'Grammar Don’t Matter on a First Date'

Mark Butler in 'Grammar Don't Matter on a First Date'
Elephant & Wheelbarrow, 21 April 2011

I had been a bit anal over a spelling mistake in an email at work that day. Normally I wouldn't have done anything other than 'tut' loudly to myself, but this was Victoria, and she's English. If we of all people don't protect the language, who will? Her crime was to spell the word heros without an 'e.' She laughed when I pointed out the error in the nicest way possible. Laughing at me I hasten to add.