It's Edinburgh Fringe Festival time, which is an ideal reason for any traveler to visit Scotland. That's just about a good enough reason for this blog post. It will also give you some one liners to use on your travels, which will make you popular wherever you may land. Here's the pick of this year's jokes:
"You know who really gives kids a bad name? Posh and Becks" Stewart Francis
I actually preferred last year's winner:
"I've just been on a once-in-a-lifetime holiday. I'll tell you what, never again." Tim Vine
And just in the spirit of fun, here's a few more:
"I needed a password eight characters long so I picked Snow White and the Seven Dwarves." Nick Helm
"Last night, me and my girlfriend watched three DVDs back to back. Luckily, I was the one facing the telly."
Tim Vine
"I'm currently dating a couple of anorexics. Two birds, one stone."
David Gibson
"You know who really gives kids a bad name? Posh and Becks"
Stewart Francis
"Crime in multi-storey car parks. That is wrong on so many different levels."
Tim Vine
"I was playing chess with my friend and he said: 'Let's make this interesting.' So we stopped playing chess."
Matt Kirshen
"My mother told me, you don't have to put anything in your mouth you don't want to. Then she made me eat broccoli, which felt like double standards."
Sarah Millican
“Uncle Ben has died. No more Mr Rice Guy.”
Tim Vine
"I'm sure wherever my dad is he's looking down on us. He's not dead, just very condescending."
Jack Whitehall
"Hedgehogs - why can't they just share the hedge?"
Dan Antolpolski
"Velcro. What a rip-off."
Tim Vine
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